My First Mother's Day

"He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children. Praise the Lord!" Psalm 113:9

What a sweet first Mother's Day.  I woke up to the below homemade card from Justin and a gift card for a massage.  Hosanna is currently 26 pounds and Asher 24, so these mommy arms and back are rejoicing over the gift I would love most right now!  Justin let the kids draw on the card to make their mark, and came up with little signature pictures to represent them.  Hosanna's was a panda in honor of her favorite stuffed animal that she carries along everywhere. Asher's was a bicycle to represent a series of polo shirts that he wears often that have tiny bicycle's embroidered on them.  I thought the logos were quite clever.

Thinking back to last year's Mother's Day causes so much sheer joy to burst from my heart.  That was such a difficult season of waiting, longing, and angst within.  There was a heavy emptiness in our home, and an ongoing grief from babies lost that was piercing.  Though I was not "officially" Hosanna and Asher's mommy at the time, I sure felt like I was deep in my heart.  No one else was waging warfare for their lives like Justin and I were.  No one.

The gift of motherhood this year has not been "ultimate".  Jesus has been "ultimate" ever since He became Lord of my life.  I do not deserve the good gifts of Hosanna and Asher but He has chosen to make them mine for this season and I am so overjoyed beyond words for that.  The heaviness and longing to care for the needs of little ones has been fulfilled.  Though Hosanna and Asher have brought an indescribable joy to our home; I'm constantly reminded that if God had never given us children we would have been given more than we deserve because He had given us Himself. I think that's why being a mommy has been so incredibly fantastic for me.  Because my deepest longings and desires had already been fulfilled long ago in Christ.  Motherhood has not made me whole.  Jesus has. Motherhood is making me like Christ- and I'm so thankful He's satisfied these longings and fulfilled them in a way that has made much of Him.

I'm also sobered today as I remember Hosanna and Asher's birth mothers.  They do not have the privilege of watching their babies grow up.  Asher's birthmom situation is unknown to us, but Hosanna's is.  And it is heart wrenching.  Flashes of that beautiful woman with her piercing eyes often come to my mind and I pray for her. I dressed the kids in their traditional Ethiopian outfits for Mother's Day in honor of these women who carried them for 9 months.  My heart is heavy for the circumstances that led them to give up their children for adoption and I pray that God will bring beauty from ashes in their lives.  I'm so grateful they made a loving choice for their babies.


My heart is also burdened by the many, many orphans world-wide who have no one to call mommy today.  For the orphans stuck in orphanages or substandard facilities who do have adoptive families waiting for them but just cannot get to them because of beaurocracy and red tape.  For the countless teenagers who are about to age out of the system. And for the many children who are not fortunate enough to even be living in an orphanage where their daily needs are being met. I can rejoice today because my kiddos are in my arms, and I do.  But my heart dare not forget the mommy-less.  Reading this article today has reminded me- my warfare for orphans is not over.